America Hetaloid and how to take care of it
Thank you for ordering from Hetaloid Corp. Here is a list of instructions for
caring for your new America Hetaloid. With your new Hetaloid is a few things.
America Hetaloid comes with:
-one Military outfit
-one Bomber jacket
-an American flag
-One casual outfit
-A bag of McDonald's fast food
-An alien plush toy
-A gun
-A map of the United States
-a Limited warranty in case your Hetaloid were to break.
Taking care of your Hetaloid comes with great responsibility. following
these guidlines are simple as 1,2,3. However, failure to follow these guidlines
may result in destruction of your Hetaloid, a depressed Hetaloid, or a 2p!
Hetaloid. (Warning: 2p! Hetaloids may cause destruction of your house,
blood loss, heart attack, stroke, deep wounds, and fangasms.)
How to Activate your America Hetaloid
To activate your America Hetaloid, place a bag filled with McDonald's
Hamburgers in front of a working fan. the aroma from the food will activate your
America Hetaloid, making it's Happiness Meter filled to the top. Another way to
wake up your America Hetaloid is to ask him this; "America, would you like to
play a mind numbing video game?" Your America Hetaloid will wake up, and
respond with a really hyperactive yes. this will cause his Happiness Meter to
Sky Rocket.
What to feed your America Hetaloid
Warning you now, America Hetaloid has a very large appetite, so it is best
to keep your refridgerator stocked with a lot of food. America Hetaloid's
favorite food would be Hamburgers from McDonald's, or other fast food joints.
Your America Hetaloid will have his happiness meter filled, so you will not have
to worry about keeping him happy. However, his happiness meter will go down if
you feed him certain foods like scones. Your America Hetaloid will frown, and
comment how it tastes like, "petrified couch stuffing", causing him to sulk and
his meter will decrease by half. Another food America Hetaloid will enjoy is ice
cream. Giving this Hetaloid ice cream, will result in big hugs and heroic
laughs.
Warning: After feeding America Hetaloid Hamburgers, be sure he stays
away from scales. America Hetaloid has a habit of weighing himself, and the
results will end up with him sulking even worse, think of fad diets to try out, and his happiness meter plummeting.
To fix this, give him a compliment about how he is a hero, and that he is not
fat, for it is actually muscle.
Entertain your America Hetaloid
America Hetaloid can get bored easily, so it is best you keep him
entertained. The best things to entertain him with would be Video games. Certain types would be racing, sports,
scifi, action, etc. If America Hetaloid can play it on any game system, then his
happiness meter will stay full. Be cautious though, America can play video games
for a few hours to half the day. If you are the type to not own video games,
then return your America Hetaloid in exchange for a different one. America
Hetaloid also enjoys comic books. Superhero comic books to be exact. His most
favorite ones would be Superman, Captain America, and Batman.
Warning: Do not Let your America Hetaloid watch horror films. this
will cause America Hetaloid to freak out (terribly), scream for mister pillow,
or squeeze you tightly until the movie ends. Unless you want that to happen,
then it's your own responsibility to look after your frightened Hetaloid.
America Hetaloids are also compatible with other Hetaloids. Though some
would be best to keep away from America Hetaloid, or else his meter will
plummet, or cause him to snap.
America Hetaloids are compatible with these other Hetaloids
England Hetaloid: America Hetaloid's love to annoy England
Hetaloids. They are prone to poke fun at England Hetaloid's imaginary friends.
America Hetaloids also make fun of England hetaloid's cooking, causing the
England Hetaloid's to snap, and curse the America Hetaloids. However, these two
will get along somewhat, so long as you don't mention the war of 1776, or have
the England Hetaloid's near the America Hetaloids on the Fourth of July. The
results will not be pretty. Though with due time, if you try to ship the America
and England Hetaloids, prepare to fangirl, and keep a lot of tissues, for there
will be a lot of blood loss from nose bleeds. They make a really good couple.
Warning: Shipping America Hetaloid with England Hetaloid will cause the England
Hetaloid to be a total tsundere.
Japan Hetaloid: Shipping your America Hetaloid with the Japan
Hetaloid will cause high pitched squeals from fangirls, making Japan very
Ukeish. These two will get a long fine, due to some of the things they have in
common, such as playing video games.
Canada Hetaloid: Canada Hetaloids, the twin Hetaloid of America's
are very rare to find, but if you were to come across one, your America Hetaloid
may or may not notice him. If your America Hetaloid does notice the Canadian
Hetaloid, he will either play a violent game of catch, have pancake eating
competitons with the Canada Hetaloid (and lose.), or enjoy ice cream with him.
Shipping these two will cause Canada Hetaloid to be more of an Uke than the
Japan Hetaloid, so prepare for more tissues and fangirling. Warning: may cause
fainting. do not ship these two if you have a weak heart.
Do not pair America Hetaloid with this Hetaloid:
Russia Hetaloid: DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT LET THESE TWO NEAR EACH
OTHER. THE RESULTS WILL END WITH A LOT OF BLOODSHED, GUNSHOTS, BROKEN VODKA
BOTTLES AND A FAUCET PIPE. America and Russia Hetaloids do not get a long well,
and if you plan to ship these two...well, good luck with that.
Q&A
Q. My America Hetaloid is covered in blood, and has dark red hair,
blood red eyes and wears sunglasses, and carries a baseball bat covered in
nails. What should i do?
A: Then you must of chosen the 2P! America Hetaloid. If you wish to
make a return in exchange for a 1P, then do so immediately, before the 2P wakes
up. If you want to keep him, it is your choice, just beware of the bloodshed,
and don't get on his bad side.
Q. Can I make my America Hetaloid my boyfriend?
A. Yes you can, but careful, America Hetaloid can not sense the
atmosphere that well. If you are able to, then your America Hetaloid will
protect you from dangerous things, and be your superhero.
Q. My America Hetaloid weighed himself and realized he's gained
weight and won't stop sulking. What should I do?
A. Well first off, you should of hidden all scales away from the
America Hetaloid. Just tell him that he did not gain weight, and explain how
muscle weighs more. After that cheer him up with some ice cream.
Q. Can my America Hetaloid help me with my homework?
A. Yes, but he's only great with History. American History.
Q. Can small kids or younger siblings be near America
Hetaloid?
A. Yes, they can. America Hetaloid is great with children.
Q. My America Hetaloid spotted a Russia Hetaloid. What should I
do?
A. Run. Run like a mother F**ker.
Q. My America Hetaloid is flirting with me. Is this normal?
A. Why yes it is. That means your America Hetaloid has taken an
interest in you. (DONT BLOW IT.)
Order now, and for a limited time, you can get another Hetaloid at half
price! call at (555) 555-5555
Warning: we are not responsible for the destruction your Hetaloid
will make. Once you've ordered your Hetaloid, it is now your responsibility to
take care of them.
caring for your new America Hetaloid. With your new Hetaloid is a few things.
America Hetaloid comes with:
-one Military outfit
-one Bomber jacket
-an American flag
-One casual outfit
-A bag of McDonald's fast food
-An alien plush toy
-A gun
-A map of the United States
-a Limited warranty in case your Hetaloid were to break.
Taking care of your Hetaloid comes with great responsibility. following
these guidlines are simple as 1,2,3. However, failure to follow these guidlines
may result in destruction of your Hetaloid, a depressed Hetaloid, or a 2p!
Hetaloid. (Warning: 2p! Hetaloids may cause destruction of your house,
blood loss, heart attack, stroke, deep wounds, and fangasms.)
How to Activate your America Hetaloid
To activate your America Hetaloid, place a bag filled with McDonald's
Hamburgers in front of a working fan. the aroma from the food will activate your
America Hetaloid, making it's Happiness Meter filled to the top. Another way to
wake up your America Hetaloid is to ask him this; "America, would you like to
play a mind numbing video game?" Your America Hetaloid will wake up, and
respond with a really hyperactive yes. this will cause his Happiness Meter to
Sky Rocket.
What to feed your America Hetaloid
Warning you now, America Hetaloid has a very large appetite, so it is best
to keep your refridgerator stocked with a lot of food. America Hetaloid's
favorite food would be Hamburgers from McDonald's, or other fast food joints.
Your America Hetaloid will have his happiness meter filled, so you will not have
to worry about keeping him happy. However, his happiness meter will go down if
you feed him certain foods like scones. Your America Hetaloid will frown, and
comment how it tastes like, "petrified couch stuffing", causing him to sulk and
his meter will decrease by half. Another food America Hetaloid will enjoy is ice
cream. Giving this Hetaloid ice cream, will result in big hugs and heroic
laughs.
Warning: After feeding America Hetaloid Hamburgers, be sure he stays
away from scales. America Hetaloid has a habit of weighing himself, and the
results will end up with him sulking even worse, think of fad diets to try out, and his happiness meter plummeting.
To fix this, give him a compliment about how he is a hero, and that he is not
fat, for it is actually muscle.
Entertain your America Hetaloid
America Hetaloid can get bored easily, so it is best you keep him
entertained. The best things to entertain him with would be Video games. Certain types would be racing, sports,
scifi, action, etc. If America Hetaloid can play it on any game system, then his
happiness meter will stay full. Be cautious though, America can play video games
for a few hours to half the day. If you are the type to not own video games,
then return your America Hetaloid in exchange for a different one. America
Hetaloid also enjoys comic books. Superhero comic books to be exact. His most
favorite ones would be Superman, Captain America, and Batman.
Warning: Do not Let your America Hetaloid watch horror films. this
will cause America Hetaloid to freak out (terribly), scream for mister pillow,
or squeeze you tightly until the movie ends. Unless you want that to happen,
then it's your own responsibility to look after your frightened Hetaloid.
America Hetaloids are also compatible with other Hetaloids. Though some
would be best to keep away from America Hetaloid, or else his meter will
plummet, or cause him to snap.
America Hetaloids are compatible with these other Hetaloids
England Hetaloid: America Hetaloid's love to annoy England
Hetaloids. They are prone to poke fun at England Hetaloid's imaginary friends.
America Hetaloids also make fun of England hetaloid's cooking, causing the
England Hetaloid's to snap, and curse the America Hetaloids. However, these two
will get along somewhat, so long as you don't mention the war of 1776, or have
the England Hetaloid's near the America Hetaloids on the Fourth of July. The
results will not be pretty. Though with due time, if you try to ship the America
and England Hetaloids, prepare to fangirl, and keep a lot of tissues, for there
will be a lot of blood loss from nose bleeds. They make a really good couple.
Warning: Shipping America Hetaloid with England Hetaloid will cause the England
Hetaloid to be a total tsundere.
Japan Hetaloid: Shipping your America Hetaloid with the Japan
Hetaloid will cause high pitched squeals from fangirls, making Japan very
Ukeish. These two will get a long fine, due to some of the things they have in
common, such as playing video games.
Canada Hetaloid: Canada Hetaloids, the twin Hetaloid of America's
are very rare to find, but if you were to come across one, your America Hetaloid
may or may not notice him. If your America Hetaloid does notice the Canadian
Hetaloid, he will either play a violent game of catch, have pancake eating
competitons with the Canada Hetaloid (and lose.), or enjoy ice cream with him.
Shipping these two will cause Canada Hetaloid to be more of an Uke than the
Japan Hetaloid, so prepare for more tissues and fangirling. Warning: may cause
fainting. do not ship these two if you have a weak heart.
Do not pair America Hetaloid with this Hetaloid:
Russia Hetaloid: DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT LET THESE TWO NEAR EACH
OTHER. THE RESULTS WILL END WITH A LOT OF BLOODSHED, GUNSHOTS, BROKEN VODKA
BOTTLES AND A FAUCET PIPE. America and Russia Hetaloids do not get a long well,
and if you plan to ship these two...well, good luck with that.
Q&A
Q. My America Hetaloid is covered in blood, and has dark red hair,
blood red eyes and wears sunglasses, and carries a baseball bat covered in
nails. What should i do?
A: Then you must of chosen the 2P! America Hetaloid. If you wish to
make a return in exchange for a 1P, then do so immediately, before the 2P wakes
up. If you want to keep him, it is your choice, just beware of the bloodshed,
and don't get on his bad side.
Q. Can I make my America Hetaloid my boyfriend?
A. Yes you can, but careful, America Hetaloid can not sense the
atmosphere that well. If you are able to, then your America Hetaloid will
protect you from dangerous things, and be your superhero.
Q. My America Hetaloid weighed himself and realized he's gained
weight and won't stop sulking. What should I do?
A. Well first off, you should of hidden all scales away from the
America Hetaloid. Just tell him that he did not gain weight, and explain how
muscle weighs more. After that cheer him up with some ice cream.
Q. Can my America Hetaloid help me with my homework?
A. Yes, but he's only great with History. American History.
Q. Can small kids or younger siblings be near America
Hetaloid?
A. Yes, they can. America Hetaloid is great with children.
Q. My America Hetaloid spotted a Russia Hetaloid. What should I
do?
A. Run. Run like a mother F**ker.
Q. My America Hetaloid is flirting with me. Is this normal?
A. Why yes it is. That means your America Hetaloid has taken an
interest in you. (DONT BLOW IT.)
Order now, and for a limited time, you can get another Hetaloid at half
price! call at (555) 555-5555
Warning: we are not responsible for the destruction your Hetaloid
will make. Once you've ordered your Hetaloid, it is now your responsibility to
take care of them.